I guess I'm a "crunchy" Momma. I breastfeed. We babywear. We sometimes co-sleep. We're not pushing solids. And we cloth diaper. For the most part, we've gotten positive feedback on our parenting styles, and we're really happy with how things have been working for us. But lately, we've had some underhanded comments. And my mom friends have indicated it could be because our parenting methods seem to be an affront to the way our friends and family have done things.
Let me be clear: as long as your child is fed, clothed, and happy (when possible, because let's face it, no one is happy 100% of the time), YOU ARE A GOOD PARENT. We are only exploring and finding what works for us. We're also really frugal, so sometimes we are doing things just to save a little money (home ownership, raising a baby, and trying to acquire our professional licensing are really expensive!).
So I breastfeed, because I've been lucky enough to be able to. And I love it. I won't hide it, because it's not shameful. Am I anti-formula? No. I'm not letting her have it because we don't NEED it right now. That could change, my supply could tank. And if we have to, that's what we'll do. Formula is wonderful for women who can't or don't want to breastfeed. To me, it's the difference between mom's choice for dinner and dad's. Both parents want a happy, healthy baby, they just fed a different meal.
We babywear (yes, Hubs does too). Because hey, I can carry more than Hugbug this way. And she gets to enjoy the world. And because, for me, it's SO much more comfortable than the carrying a baby lean so there's a ledge for her because I have nearly no hips. I'm not against strollers, and there are days I pop her in the stroller and off we go. But when we're in and out of the subway in the city? Or at the grocery store needing to push a cart and have her NOT grabbing everything in sight? Or just around the house and she wants that extra loving? Into the wrap! Who has ever regretted a moment holding their child anyway?
We co-sleep. Carefully. Safely. And only when it's the only way the three of us will get the sleep we all need to make it through the next day. And when she's not in our bed, she's in our room- because our research has shown a reduced risk of SIDS when infants share the same room as their caregivers. She'll be in her own room soon enough. We're lucky to have a pretty good sleeper. She doesn't fidget loudly or snore, so she's not effecting our sleep when she's in our room. Everyone is sleeping, which is the point!
We're not pushing solids, because our research shows she's not ready. Also, Hugbug has shown us she's not ready. Everything goes in her mouth these days, except food. She wants to take it from us, hold it, play with it, but not eat it. And that's ok. Because she'll get there. No need to rush, you know?
And we cloth diaper. Hybrid style. We use gdiapers, because for $150 we are using the same diapers over and over, and it's saving us $50/month MINIMUM. Is it a bit more work? Yes. Is it sometimes gross? Yes. But hey, I'd have to change that diaper and wash my hands anyway, so to me, it's no big deal. And for Hugbug, it's helped with rash prevention. We had disposables in the beginning and some brands have really bothered her. With the cloth, she hasn't had another rash, or a grand master freakout when she fills a diaper mid-commute. But if you're not into that, that's cool. I'm not so green, you must be sustainable and offsetting your carbon that I'm going to jump down your throat for using a disposable diaper. Heck, some days she has disposable inserts in her gdiaper!
All in all, we're happy and Hugbug is happy. And isn't that the goal? To have a happy family? That's all I've ever wanted. So whether you breastfeed or formula feed, babywear or use a stroller, share a room or not, jump on solids or take it slow, cloth diaper or use disposables, GOOD FOR YOU. Just because we don't do things the same way doesn't mean I think you're doing it wrong. I don't know your baby like you do. You know what works for your baby, your schedule, your lifestyle, your baby. You are parenting. And that's awesome.
Friday, December 6, 2013
Thursday, November 14, 2013
Working Mom... and all that entails
So, I haven't updated in a few months. I've been really busy, now that I'm back to work, we moved, and I'm a working mom with a new house and the holiday season is upon us. I'm really hoping to get into a better routine with writing, so I'll use this as a chance to get up to date before becoming a bit more regular about this blogging stuff.
Working: I'm back at work full time, which means Hugbug is in daycare full time. It's HARD. Sunday nights and Monday mornings are typically the worst part of my week, but they get a bit better each week. The office has been fairly busy, so that's helpful with keeping me occupied. Two of my big projects closed out (or are closing out) which means a bit of downtime, but it also is a nice accomplished feeling. And it means no more worrying about when I will have to travel down to NJ to oversee things on site (I'm a wimp and hate traveling to site in the winter!). I'm now spending time working with both of our Project Architects, which I think tends to help me in my path to licensure because I see different methods for design and documentation.
I'm hoping to begin taking the exams in the Spring, because by then I'm hoping we will be settled a bit more into life as parents and homeowners. Oh, and have that lovely spare cash required to actually apply and take the exams. If you're interested in what that means, check out this blog.
Home: So we bought a house. It's thrilling and terrifying all at once. I love coming home to our little home, even if it currently is a disastrous mess. We need to fully renovate the kitchen and bath in the next few years. They are basics functional at this point, so we can live with it. But the bath is ugly (picture pink marbleized panel walls with yellow-off-white commercial housing base). The kitchen has 12" of total counterspace. The cabinets are sturdy and economy quality, so we are looking into refacing and adding additional cabinets and counters as a renovation option. We'll see. We're about 50% unpacked, and Hugbug's room is coming along great- it's painted (except the trim) and the chair rail is almost done. Her furniture is built, and we have all the pieces and parts we want for now. Hubs is hoping to finish up this weekend, which means Momma and Baby will be making themselves occupied elsewhere. Our room is set up, primed for paint. The living room is set up. That's about it there.
Baby: Hugbug is growing in leaps and bounds, she's 4-1/2 months old (20 weeks yesterday) At her last well-check she was 16 lbs, 11.5 oz (95% percentile) and 27" (off the charts!). I'm feeling great with the parenting thing when we have great checkups like that. I'm so grateful that breastfeeding is working out so well for us. My mom has also gotten a lot more understanding about it for the most part. She was a formula mom, which is awesome, because my sister and I are super healthy and happy and we were fed, which is what's really important. But she is learning from us what it means to breastfeed, and what differences there are (eating times, sleeping times, pumping when away, etc).
Hugbug has also hit several milestones lately: she SAT UP (from an incline, I'll be fully honest) all by herself the other night and was so proud of herself. Now whenever she's laid down, she's trying so hard to sit up. It looks like she's doing crunches (I know, babies don't do crunches!). She's only rolled belly to back, and even then, only twice. She just doesn't seem interested. She's still only sort of laughing. She prefers to squeal. She loves to practice standing. And she saw her first snowflakes on 11/12/13 (fun!). She wasn't impressed, just confused. But it was cute.
All in all, things are going well. Now if I can just keep up with the meal planning, meal prepping, house unpacking, baby raising, working life and remember to post once in a while, that'd be great!I'll leave you with a cute baby picture!
Working: I'm back at work full time, which means Hugbug is in daycare full time. It's HARD. Sunday nights and Monday mornings are typically the worst part of my week, but they get a bit better each week. The office has been fairly busy, so that's helpful with keeping me occupied. Two of my big projects closed out (or are closing out) which means a bit of downtime, but it also is a nice accomplished feeling. And it means no more worrying about when I will have to travel down to NJ to oversee things on site (I'm a wimp and hate traveling to site in the winter!). I'm now spending time working with both of our Project Architects, which I think tends to help me in my path to licensure because I see different methods for design and documentation.
I'm hoping to begin taking the exams in the Spring, because by then I'm hoping we will be settled a bit more into life as parents and homeowners. Oh, and have that lovely spare cash required to actually apply and take the exams. If you're interested in what that means, check out this blog.
Home: So we bought a house. It's thrilling and terrifying all at once. I love coming home to our little home, even if it currently is a disastrous mess. We need to fully renovate the kitchen and bath in the next few years. They are basics functional at this point, so we can live with it. But the bath is ugly (picture pink marbleized panel walls with yellow-off-white commercial housing base). The kitchen has 12" of total counterspace. The cabinets are sturdy and economy quality, so we are looking into refacing and adding additional cabinets and counters as a renovation option. We'll see. We're about 50% unpacked, and Hugbug's room is coming along great- it's painted (except the trim) and the chair rail is almost done. Her furniture is built, and we have all the pieces and parts we want for now. Hubs is hoping to finish up this weekend, which means Momma and Baby will be making themselves occupied elsewhere. Our room is set up, primed for paint. The living room is set up. That's about it there.
Baby: Hugbug is growing in leaps and bounds, she's 4-1/2 months old (20 weeks yesterday) At her last well-check she was 16 lbs, 11.5 oz (95% percentile) and 27" (off the charts!). I'm feeling great with the parenting thing when we have great checkups like that. I'm so grateful that breastfeeding is working out so well for us. My mom has also gotten a lot more understanding about it for the most part. She was a formula mom, which is awesome, because my sister and I are super healthy and happy and we were fed, which is what's really important. But she is learning from us what it means to breastfeed, and what differences there are (eating times, sleeping times, pumping when away, etc).
Hugbug has also hit several milestones lately: she SAT UP (from an incline, I'll be fully honest) all by herself the other night and was so proud of herself. Now whenever she's laid down, she's trying so hard to sit up. It looks like she's doing crunches (I know, babies don't do crunches!). She's only rolled belly to back, and even then, only twice. She just doesn't seem interested. She's still only sort of laughing. She prefers to squeal. She loves to practice standing. And she saw her first snowflakes on 11/12/13 (fun!). She wasn't impressed, just confused. But it was cute.
All in all, things are going well. Now if I can just keep up with the meal planning, meal prepping, house unpacking, baby raising, working life and remember to post once in a while, that'd be great!I'll leave you with a cute baby picture!
Tuesday, July 9, 2013
Things you can't prepare for about Parenthood
You think you know what to expect when your baby arrives: late nights, nights with little sleep, insane amounts of diapers, but there are things you cannot prepare for.
Like when your 5 day late baby has a fever at birth, and is taken away to the NICU, without you or your husband and you can't see her for nearly 12 hours, because you have a fever too, and your baby and others are safer with you somewhere else.
The feeling you get when you realize that the little baby you've been carrying for months is no longer just yours- that now that she has arrived and is an "outside baby" you are sharing her with the world. You are still connected, but it's no longer a physical connection that no one else could possibly understand.
The desire to never put her down, or stop staring at her, or talking to her, because heaven forbid she misses a moment in your arms.
The constant need to know she's breathing. And looking at her isn't enough to confirm it. You have to hear the soft, gentle breaths from her tiny nose, and feel her heartbeat under your hand when you rub her little torso.
The utter calm you feel when your baby is sleeping in your arms, and a little smile crosses her face (even if it is just gas).
The way you fall in love all over again with her Daddy, because watching them together you know there is no better man in the world (except maybe your own Daddy!).
How awesome it is to watch your husband fall in love with his little girl, and how it hurts to watch him leave for work, knowing he would rather spend the day staring at your child with you.
Like when your 5 day late baby has a fever at birth, and is taken away to the NICU, without you or your husband and you can't see her for nearly 12 hours, because you have a fever too, and your baby and others are safer with you somewhere else.
The feeling you get when you realize that the little baby you've been carrying for months is no longer just yours- that now that she has arrived and is an "outside baby" you are sharing her with the world. You are still connected, but it's no longer a physical connection that no one else could possibly understand.
The desire to never put her down, or stop staring at her, or talking to her, because heaven forbid she misses a moment in your arms.
The constant need to know she's breathing. And looking at her isn't enough to confirm it. You have to hear the soft, gentle breaths from her tiny nose, and feel her heartbeat under your hand when you rub her little torso.
The utter calm you feel when your baby is sleeping in your arms, and a little smile crosses her face (even if it is just gas).
The way you fall in love all over again with her Daddy, because watching them together you know there is no better man in the world (except maybe your own Daddy!).
How awesome it is to watch your husband fall in love with his little girl, and how it hurts to watch him leave for work, knowing he would rather spend the day staring at your child with you.
Saturday, June 29, 2013
Hugbug's Birth Story
Our little Hugbug has arrived, and we could not be happier. She is well and we are back home, enjoying every precious minute.
On Tuesday, June 25, I had my first "post date" appointment at the OB. The appointment consisted of a standard checkup and NST, with an ultrasound to check for fluids. During the NST I was informed I was having some contractions, I was just mistaking them for mega baby stretches. They weren't regular, or painful at all. Dr. K also indicated I was 2+ cm dilated (not at three, but definitely further than two) and 50% effaced. So I went to work as planned, and finished out the day.
That night, Hubs made pasta for dinner and we had a yummy ice cream treat for dessert. After dinner my back started bothering me a little, similar to the back pain I've experienced throughout my pregnancy, and so I blew it off, and we finished packing most of our things for the hospital, as the planned induction was now set for June 28. We were ready to head to bed around 10:30, but my back pain was now increasing, so I went for my heat pack. As I got into bed, I felt like Hugbug kicked, there was a strange popping feeling, and then my water broke (10:52 PM). I won't say it was like the movies with the big flood of fluids making a mess everywhere, but it was enough of a gush feeling that I jumped out of bed faster than I've moved in the last 9 months. I ran to the bathroom to clean up (we had to report directly to the hospital upon membrane rupture) and Hubs called the doctor to let them know we would be on our way shortly. We ended up a bit further delayed because my contractions started fast and hard, with only about a moment or so in between, and I lost my supper. Once I was able to control my nausea somewhat, we got in the car and off we went.
We went straight to the ER entrance to be escorted straight to L&D, and there was another couple heading in also going to L&D. My contractions were still really hard, and the pain was getting pretty bad, pretty quickly. The peaks of the contractions were really long, and the rise and fall was only a few seconds. I was beginning to think my med-free plan was quickly becoming a thing of the past. Our Childbirth educator was the head nurse in L&D, so she checked us into triage and helped direct me into my breathing exercises, giving me a short time of taking control of my labor back. In triage, I was examined and determined to be beyond 5 cm. Our nurse looked a bit concerned based on the mornings exam and the quick pace we'd described since my water broke. I was immediately given fluids and the antibiotics required for my strep positive.
The contractions were so close together at that point, that I was having trouble catching my breath in between and wasn't able to keep up with the breathing exercises. At about midnight, they tried to move me down the hall to my birthing suite, when the worst of the contractions knocked me to my knees and at that point, all caring about med-free was gone. I was settled into the birthing suite, and Dr. K and the anesthesiologist were contacted to head in our direction. They were in the process of completing a section, so upon Dr. K's arrival, she quickly examined my progress: 7 cm and nearly fully effaced. She said she would attempt to get me an epi, but at the rate we were going, it was possible that I may just have to push through the pain, and deliver med-free.
Dr. C did arrive shortly after and was able to administer the epi, with allowed me about an hour to rest in which time I was fully dilated to 10, with only a small amount of effacement to go. At 4: 15 ish I called out to the nurses station telling them I was feeling so much pressure that I wouldn't be able to resist pushing for much longer. Dr. K was in the process of delivering another baby in the unit, so our nurse returned to help me get started pushing. She and Russ each took a side, and we began pushing our baby into the world. She kept encouraging me that each push was being extremely productive, and Russ counted out the time for each push. We had been nervous he may pass out (as he does when he has blood draws/etc for himself), but he was a pillar of calm and strength once we had gotten into the car. They offered me the big mirror to watch her come out, but I declined. At that point, I still thought I might not be quite in love with all the lovely delivery fluids etc, so instead we just kept pushing. Dr. K arrived at about 10 after 5, and quickly determined we would soon have our little baby. Russ kept counting out pushes, and Dr. K began assisting Hugbug's head. Dr. K then indicated that one more push could be the last, and without realizing it, I stopped pushing with contractions, and pushed hard and strong with no contraction assistance, as Russ and our Nurse attempted to figure out why I was pushing. Our baby slid out quickly (5:27 am), and was suctioned and placed directly to my chest. Our Team Green baby was Team Pink!
I couldn't have cared less at that moment what she was covered in, I just pulled her close and looked into the most beautiful eyes I had ever seen in my life. She was looking directly at me, and then toward her Daddy. I looked up to see Russ had tears in his eyes too. The nurses had to keep reminding me they were trying to clean her up because I was holding her so close and giving such a small amount of room for them to do their work. We snuggled and Daddy picked from our top two names: our little Hugbug Arianna was given her name.
They then moved her over to the little Baby station in the room to weigh, measure, diaper and hat her. At that point it was determined that both she and I had fevers over 101, and it was determined she would be brought to the NICU shortly. We were given the time until the NICU doc arrived to cuddle her and tell her we loved her. Dr. F was extremely calming, and reminded us all of these measures were precautionary as a result of the temperatures, and we would be with her soon. Russ was reunited with her within about a half hour, and I had to wait until 3 pm to see her, after several normal vitals checks.
And now: gratuitous baby images!
On Tuesday, June 25, I had my first "post date" appointment at the OB. The appointment consisted of a standard checkup and NST, with an ultrasound to check for fluids. During the NST I was informed I was having some contractions, I was just mistaking them for mega baby stretches. They weren't regular, or painful at all. Dr. K also indicated I was 2+ cm dilated (not at three, but definitely further than two) and 50% effaced. So I went to work as planned, and finished out the day.
That night, Hubs made pasta for dinner and we had a yummy ice cream treat for dessert. After dinner my back started bothering me a little, similar to the back pain I've experienced throughout my pregnancy, and so I blew it off, and we finished packing most of our things for the hospital, as the planned induction was now set for June 28. We were ready to head to bed around 10:30, but my back pain was now increasing, so I went for my heat pack. As I got into bed, I felt like Hugbug kicked, there was a strange popping feeling, and then my water broke (10:52 PM). I won't say it was like the movies with the big flood of fluids making a mess everywhere, but it was enough of a gush feeling that I jumped out of bed faster than I've moved in the last 9 months. I ran to the bathroom to clean up (we had to report directly to the hospital upon membrane rupture) and Hubs called the doctor to let them know we would be on our way shortly. We ended up a bit further delayed because my contractions started fast and hard, with only about a moment or so in between, and I lost my supper. Once I was able to control my nausea somewhat, we got in the car and off we went.
We went straight to the ER entrance to be escorted straight to L&D, and there was another couple heading in also going to L&D. My contractions were still really hard, and the pain was getting pretty bad, pretty quickly. The peaks of the contractions were really long, and the rise and fall was only a few seconds. I was beginning to think my med-free plan was quickly becoming a thing of the past. Our Childbirth educator was the head nurse in L&D, so she checked us into triage and helped direct me into my breathing exercises, giving me a short time of taking control of my labor back. In triage, I was examined and determined to be beyond 5 cm. Our nurse looked a bit concerned based on the mornings exam and the quick pace we'd described since my water broke. I was immediately given fluids and the antibiotics required for my strep positive.
The contractions were so close together at that point, that I was having trouble catching my breath in between and wasn't able to keep up with the breathing exercises. At about midnight, they tried to move me down the hall to my birthing suite, when the worst of the contractions knocked me to my knees and at that point, all caring about med-free was gone. I was settled into the birthing suite, and Dr. K and the anesthesiologist were contacted to head in our direction. They were in the process of completing a section, so upon Dr. K's arrival, she quickly examined my progress: 7 cm and nearly fully effaced. She said she would attempt to get me an epi, but at the rate we were going, it was possible that I may just have to push through the pain, and deliver med-free.
Dr. C did arrive shortly after and was able to administer the epi, with allowed me about an hour to rest in which time I was fully dilated to 10, with only a small amount of effacement to go. At 4: 15 ish I called out to the nurses station telling them I was feeling so much pressure that I wouldn't be able to resist pushing for much longer. Dr. K was in the process of delivering another baby in the unit, so our nurse returned to help me get started pushing. She and Russ each took a side, and we began pushing our baby into the world. She kept encouraging me that each push was being extremely productive, and Russ counted out the time for each push. We had been nervous he may pass out (as he does when he has blood draws/etc for himself), but he was a pillar of calm and strength once we had gotten into the car. They offered me the big mirror to watch her come out, but I declined. At that point, I still thought I might not be quite in love with all the lovely delivery fluids etc, so instead we just kept pushing. Dr. K arrived at about 10 after 5, and quickly determined we would soon have our little baby. Russ kept counting out pushes, and Dr. K began assisting Hugbug's head. Dr. K then indicated that one more push could be the last, and without realizing it, I stopped pushing with contractions, and pushed hard and strong with no contraction assistance, as Russ and our Nurse attempted to figure out why I was pushing. Our baby slid out quickly (5:27 am), and was suctioned and placed directly to my chest. Our Team Green baby was Team Pink!
I couldn't have cared less at that moment what she was covered in, I just pulled her close and looked into the most beautiful eyes I had ever seen in my life. She was looking directly at me, and then toward her Daddy. I looked up to see Russ had tears in his eyes too. The nurses had to keep reminding me they were trying to clean her up because I was holding her so close and giving such a small amount of room for them to do their work. We snuggled and Daddy picked from our top two names: our little Hugbug Arianna was given her name.
They then moved her over to the little Baby station in the room to weigh, measure, diaper and hat her. At that point it was determined that both she and I had fevers over 101, and it was determined she would be brought to the NICU shortly. We were given the time until the NICU doc arrived to cuddle her and tell her we loved her. Dr. F was extremely calming, and reminded us all of these measures were precautionary as a result of the temperatures, and we would be with her soon. Russ was reunited with her within about a half hour, and I had to wait until 3 pm to see her, after several normal vitals checks.
And now: gratuitous baby images!
Saturday, June 1, 2013
"Term" & Baby Art!
Baby Hugbug is officially "Term". That, to those who may not know, means I have been cooking my baby for 37 weeks, of the expected 40 weeks. We have a baby who will be here this month- Happy June!
I'm currently at the point where I'm even beyond the yucky symptoms- I deal with the HG, the feeling like a beached whale, the headaches, etc. It feels like everyday stuff at this point. At least, that's what I thought- until the past week or so, when I noticed the lovely stretchmarks that have started to snake their way up my bump. At first, I was a bit mortified, and also kind of disgusted. I mean, it's these really odd purple-ish lines where there was once smooth, clear looking skin. I know, pregnancy means changes, I knew that when I "got into this".
So I've decided to embrace what I've now deemed to bremy baby's art. I only have a few- there's a little patch of tiny marks on the right, one longer line on the left, and the funny 'X' through my old belly ring spot. So this is my Baby's art. My little one is "marking" his/her Momma, leaving permanent "proof" that I grew this baby inside me for 9 months. All my little Hugbug's little dancing and snuggling, playing "fist bump" with Daddy, has lead to some little purple lines on the canvas of my body, showing that I was given a precious gift- the opportunity to grow life inside me.
I'm sure there will be days where I will be irritated by these lines on my body, when I want to wear a bikini without them being noticed, when I want Hubs to see me as I was when we were young, and newly in love. But I will try to remember that they are proof of a blessing, and proof that we have been blessed with giving life, life from the love that we share.
I'm currently at the point where I'm even beyond the yucky symptoms- I deal with the HG, the feeling like a beached whale, the headaches, etc. It feels like everyday stuff at this point. At least, that's what I thought- until the past week or so, when I noticed the lovely stretchmarks that have started to snake their way up my bump. At first, I was a bit mortified, and also kind of disgusted. I mean, it's these really odd purple-ish lines where there was once smooth, clear looking skin. I know, pregnancy means changes, I knew that when I "got into this".
So I've decided to embrace what I've now deemed to bremy baby's art. I only have a few- there's a little patch of tiny marks on the right, one longer line on the left, and the funny 'X' through my old belly ring spot. So this is my Baby's art. My little one is "marking" his/her Momma, leaving permanent "proof" that I grew this baby inside me for 9 months. All my little Hugbug's little dancing and snuggling, playing "fist bump" with Daddy, has lead to some little purple lines on the canvas of my body, showing that I was given a precious gift- the opportunity to grow life inside me.
I'm sure there will be days where I will be irritated by these lines on my body, when I want to wear a bikini without them being noticed, when I want Hubs to see me as I was when we were young, and newly in love. But I will try to remember that they are proof of a blessing, and proof that we have been blessed with giving life, life from the love that we share.
Thursday, April 11, 2013
The Guessing has Begun
So... around this time 9 years ago I met my sweet Hubby. 8 years ago today, we became "official". And according to the Hebrew calendar, this sunset is marking the end of our first year of marriage.
Anyway, tomorrow marks the 30-week mark of this pregnancy, and I got the bright idea to catalog the "Old Wives Tales" for predicting Baby's sex based on the high rate of people guessing this week (I'd keep a tally, but I already forgot how many of each).
String Test/Ring Test: Hold your wedding ring by a string over your belly. If the ring swings in a line, Baby is a girl, in a circle, Baby is a boy.
We got both results for this one- it seemed to depend more on which hand I held the string.
Cravings: Sweet cravings mean Baby is a girl, Sour cravings mean Baby is a boy.
Cravings that have stayed down have been sweet- so I guess that means girl.
Morning Sickness: Extremely sick Mommas mean Baby is a girl, Low sickness rates mean Baby is a boy.
Not sure how much stock I put in this one, because of my HG (Big Sis had HG for both her daughter and son) but the general theory says girl.
Daddy's weight: If Daddy gains "Sympathy Weight" Baby is a girl, if Daddy remains the same, Baby is a boy.
Girl.
Carrying High/Low: If the bump is high, Baby is a girl, if the bump is low, Baby is a boy.
Another draw- my Bump is quite "middle ground" but all out front. Also, I feel kicking down low, but a little skull pushing it's way into my rib cage.
Heart Rate: Heart rate over 140 means Baby is a girl, under 140 means Baby is a boy.
Third draw- Up until our last appointment, the Baby's heart rate was over 140, last appointment was 135.
So that's 3 for girl, and three draws. However, it seems most people think Baby is a boy when they see me. So.... until arrival we won't know. But it will be neat to see how the different "theories" pan out.
Anyway, tomorrow marks the 30-week mark of this pregnancy, and I got the bright idea to catalog the "Old Wives Tales" for predicting Baby's sex based on the high rate of people guessing this week (I'd keep a tally, but I already forgot how many of each).
String Test/Ring Test: Hold your wedding ring by a string over your belly. If the ring swings in a line, Baby is a girl, in a circle, Baby is a boy.
We got both results for this one- it seemed to depend more on which hand I held the string.
Cravings: Sweet cravings mean Baby is a girl, Sour cravings mean Baby is a boy.
Cravings that have stayed down have been sweet- so I guess that means girl.
Morning Sickness: Extremely sick Mommas mean Baby is a girl, Low sickness rates mean Baby is a boy.
Not sure how much stock I put in this one, because of my HG (Big Sis had HG for both her daughter and son) but the general theory says girl.
Daddy's weight: If Daddy gains "Sympathy Weight" Baby is a girl, if Daddy remains the same, Baby is a boy.
Girl.
Carrying High/Low: If the bump is high, Baby is a girl, if the bump is low, Baby is a boy.
Another draw- my Bump is quite "middle ground" but all out front. Also, I feel kicking down low, but a little skull pushing it's way into my rib cage.
Heart Rate: Heart rate over 140 means Baby is a girl, under 140 means Baby is a boy.
Third draw- Up until our last appointment, the Baby's heart rate was over 140, last appointment was 135.
So that's 3 for girl, and three draws. However, it seems most people think Baby is a boy when they see me. So.... until arrival we won't know. But it will be neat to see how the different "theories" pan out.
Tuesday, April 2, 2013
GTT to the first Momma-Baby Compromise
So it's been awhile. We've been in the midst of crazy Spring Cleaning here, firstly because my mom and stepfather were visiting over the weekend, and second of all in preparation for moving into a house. The more we clean out now, the less we have to move and find space for!
So, let's get caught up. We are officially in the 28th week, and after a very crummy day in which I took the 3 hour glucose tolerance test, and proceeded to need to sleep through half the afternoon to ride out the overwhelming nausea that came back without my trusty HG meds, we waited rather impatiently until the following Wednesday when my calls to the office begging for results initiated the most beautiful call of the entire pregnancy: a crap condition that I DO NOT have! So, after digging into the nearest candy store... just kidding. The GD scare has encouraged us to keep a better eye on our overall eating habits around the house, and when snacking elsewhere.
In house news, the lawyers are knocking out some contract details, and we should be officially "under contract" some time this week. It hasn't quite hit me yet, although I am picturing our things throughout the house and future events in the yard, etc. I'm still in shock that we not only qualify for a mortgage, but when looking at our budget, really can afford a house (barring any financial disasters for us, and continuing on a healthy budget). The town in which the house "lives" also requires new CofO's to be issued for houses on the market of a certain age, so the seller is responsible for all code and safety related repairs prior to closing, which is what we wanted anyway. I'm happy that a huge chunk of the items we wanted done fall under that heading, and will be resolved by a requirement, so the seller won't back out because of a dislike for our requests.
Baby gifts have started arriving, including our infant carrier wrap, which I promptly opened and tested out. We will be requiring some practice on that, and I've been searching online for babywearing groups near us, but so far I haven't had any luck. I'd have though a county like this would be full of the so called "crunchy mommas" who babywear, nurse and generally do what our parents refer to as "hippie parenting". I was hoping all the parents would be into at least trying out babywearing, but my mom flat out said "no, not with my back" during a chat about it this weekend. My question- if her back is too "bad" to wear the baby in an ergonomically correct carry, how does she think she's going to be able to carry him/her in the first place? Ah, Mom-logic. You should have seen her face in the baby store this weekend looking at all the gadgetry that goes with the pump. It was like fear mixed with confusion and something else. Oh well, it's not like I'm asking her to nurse my Hugbug.
And lastly for this installment, I think Hugbug and I have reached our first Momma-Baby compromise. My back has been bothering me, getting really sore etc. So this weekend I picked up a maternity support belt. It's like those things guys wear at the gym when doing squats and such. Well, I put it on and POUF! back pain subsides instantly. Except Hugbug is livid. Starts kicking at it and overall acting like the Tasmanian Devil in anger for probably an hour. So, I've started wearing it just partial day- when I'm at work which is when the pain is the worst. The first hour Hugbug is cranky and kicks at it, but after that seems to calm down and accept it. Then when I get home and take it off, I get little cuddles, almost like "Thanks Momma I'll be good I promise".
So, let's get caught up. We are officially in the 28th week, and after a very crummy day in which I took the 3 hour glucose tolerance test, and proceeded to need to sleep through half the afternoon to ride out the overwhelming nausea that came back without my trusty HG meds, we waited rather impatiently until the following Wednesday when my calls to the office begging for results initiated the most beautiful call of the entire pregnancy: a crap condition that I DO NOT have! So, after digging into the nearest candy store... just kidding. The GD scare has encouraged us to keep a better eye on our overall eating habits around the house, and when snacking elsewhere.
In house news, the lawyers are knocking out some contract details, and we should be officially "under contract" some time this week. It hasn't quite hit me yet, although I am picturing our things throughout the house and future events in the yard, etc. I'm still in shock that we not only qualify for a mortgage, but when looking at our budget, really can afford a house (barring any financial disasters for us, and continuing on a healthy budget). The town in which the house "lives" also requires new CofO's to be issued for houses on the market of a certain age, so the seller is responsible for all code and safety related repairs prior to closing, which is what we wanted anyway. I'm happy that a huge chunk of the items we wanted done fall under that heading, and will be resolved by a requirement, so the seller won't back out because of a dislike for our requests.
Baby gifts have started arriving, including our infant carrier wrap, which I promptly opened and tested out. We will be requiring some practice on that, and I've been searching online for babywearing groups near us, but so far I haven't had any luck. I'd have though a county like this would be full of the so called "crunchy mommas" who babywear, nurse and generally do what our parents refer to as "hippie parenting". I was hoping all the parents would be into at least trying out babywearing, but my mom flat out said "no, not with my back" during a chat about it this weekend. My question- if her back is too "bad" to wear the baby in an ergonomically correct carry, how does she think she's going to be able to carry him/her in the first place? Ah, Mom-logic. You should have seen her face in the baby store this weekend looking at all the gadgetry that goes with the pump. It was like fear mixed with confusion and something else. Oh well, it's not like I'm asking her to nurse my Hugbug.
And lastly for this installment, I think Hugbug and I have reached our first Momma-Baby compromise. My back has been bothering me, getting really sore etc. So this weekend I picked up a maternity support belt. It's like those things guys wear at the gym when doing squats and such. Well, I put it on and POUF! back pain subsides instantly. Except Hugbug is livid. Starts kicking at it and overall acting like the Tasmanian Devil in anger for probably an hour. So, I've started wearing it just partial day- when I'm at work which is when the pain is the worst. The first hour Hugbug is cranky and kicks at it, but after that seems to calm down and accept it. Then when I get home and take it off, I get little cuddles, almost like "Thanks Momma I'll be good I promise".
Wednesday, March 20, 2013
The Next Pregnancy Challenge?
So, we're at 26 weeks, 5 days today and it's time for the next challenge apparently. So far we've had to deal with Hypermesis Gravidarum (acute morning sickness, if you follow Royal Baby news, you've heard of it), a starting weight loss of about 15 lbs in 2 weeks, and the 25% chance our little Hugbug could have Cystic Fibrosis. Our next hurdle may be Gestational Diabetes. I was expecting this one, partially, because I was a fairly large baby, and my mother had GD with my younger sister. Rumor has it, GD is more likely if your mom also had it.
Today was my 1 hour test- my doc required a fasting after midnight (I was allowed only my anti-nausea meds this morning). I got my bottle of orangey grossness at 7:40, realized it was just like bad orange soda, and went upstairs to my 26 week appointment. Came back down an hour later for the blood draw (lovely track marks today, FAIL). I got a 149- the goal is between 65-139 if I understand the lab paperwork correctly. So now I move on to the 3 hr test, which we will do Saturday morning. Another fasting, no meds this time (boo).
I wasn't exactly expecting pregnancy to be easy, but I was definitely not expecting to have so many challenges. The GD I expected, so besides being a bit annoyed, I'm not really upset. At least I won't be until my Thin Mints arrive. The HG and CF- I wasn't expecting at all. I had no warning. My stepsister had HG with both of her pregnancies, and it occurs in like, 2% of all pregnancies. What are the chances two non-blood related sisters would both get it- and get it bad. True, I'm not on IV fluid and nutrition like she was (for which I am insanely grateful) but I'm still frustrated that I require medication to be able to properly feed my little baby, and help him or her grow. The HG and CF play into my insecurities that I cannot keep my baby safe and healthy.
I try to stay positive- we count the days free from actually praying to the porcelain throne, I hold tight to the 75% chance my baby will not have CF. I know that many other women out there are struggling with many harder challenges- Down Syndrome, Premature births, lost babies. And when I think of them, I feel guilty. I have so much to be thankful for. I am truly blessed that our challenges are less visible, that many will be resolved just by Hugbug's arrival. So I continue to hold on to the positives, and hope for the best. Wish me luck!
Today was my 1 hour test- my doc required a fasting after midnight (I was allowed only my anti-nausea meds this morning). I got my bottle of orangey grossness at 7:40, realized it was just like bad orange soda, and went upstairs to my 26 week appointment. Came back down an hour later for the blood draw (lovely track marks today, FAIL). I got a 149- the goal is between 65-139 if I understand the lab paperwork correctly. So now I move on to the 3 hr test, which we will do Saturday morning. Another fasting, no meds this time (boo).
I wasn't exactly expecting pregnancy to be easy, but I was definitely not expecting to have so many challenges. The GD I expected, so besides being a bit annoyed, I'm not really upset. At least I won't be until my Thin Mints arrive. The HG and CF- I wasn't expecting at all. I had no warning. My stepsister had HG with both of her pregnancies, and it occurs in like, 2% of all pregnancies. What are the chances two non-blood related sisters would both get it- and get it bad. True, I'm not on IV fluid and nutrition like she was (for which I am insanely grateful) but I'm still frustrated that I require medication to be able to properly feed my little baby, and help him or her grow. The HG and CF play into my insecurities that I cannot keep my baby safe and healthy.
I try to stay positive- we count the days free from actually praying to the porcelain throne, I hold tight to the 75% chance my baby will not have CF. I know that many other women out there are struggling with many harder challenges- Down Syndrome, Premature births, lost babies. And when I think of them, I feel guilty. I have so much to be thankful for. I am truly blessed that our challenges are less visible, that many will be resolved just by Hugbug's arrival. So I continue to hold on to the positives, and hope for the best. Wish me luck!
Friday, March 8, 2013
Forgiveness & Faith
As I mentioned in my previous post, I am a huge Jodi Picoult fan. I have almost all of her books, and I re-read them often. I love how she can take a topic from so many sides, and still make you see where each character comes from in relation to the situation. In "19 Minutes" I understood Peter's pain, and Josie's inability to break away from her boyfriend and their clique. In "Keeping Faith" I could understand how Mariah could lose herself in the pain, and forget there were others who desperately needed her.
That's why I knew "The Storyteller" would be a challenge for me to read. I'm a Jewish woman, my faith is very much a part of my life. I spent 10 days in Israel in college, and I have visited numerous Holocaust museums over my lifetime. Since returning from Israel, I haven't read another book on the Holocaust. Not out of any major reason, I'd read many before my trip- "The Devil's Arithmatic", "Anne Frank", "Night", and the hardest to me.... "The Painted Bird". That was the last one I read, and there is a graphic scene that has replayed in my mind whenever the Holocaust is mentioned.
My grandparents were not in the camps- they were living here in the US by then, fighting with the Allies when the time came. However there was family there that was lost. I, like Sage in "The Storyteller" never got around to asking my grandparents for more information. Out of teen indifference, or fear of the truth, I don't know. If I had to pick a regret in my life, it would be not learning more about all four of my grandparents while I had the chance.
Regardless, when Hubs went to the book signing last week for me, as I'm still to sick with Hypermesis Gravidarum (pregnancy acute morning sickness), I knew that reading this book would be an emotional rollercoaster for me. Admittedly, most JP books are. When he handed the book to me, he begged me to take it slow, and put it down for as long as needed. I started reading right away, and usually I finish a book in a day or two. Today, because there's lovely weather occuring, my office shut down and I came home and finished the book. I won't post any spoilers, but I will say while I was not expecting the ending (either plot twist), I am in shock.
The subject of forgiveness is the primary question of the book- who has the right to forgive? Are there sins that are unforgiveable? Can you make amends for decisions and actions by doing good later? When I was at Yad Vashem, our guides and our Rabbi discussed with us the "Jewish stance" on forgiveness. You cannot grant forgiveness for something done to another. It made so much sense to me then. A man in our group was very upset by this- he blames Germans (the Nazi Germans, today's Germans) for the "crimes against our people". This only made it more clear to me. How can I forgive a person I never met? How can I forgive something that I've only been told, and never experienced? I've read many stories, heard others, seen the pictures and the stones from the Warsaw ghetto. I believe the Holocaust happened. It brings up many many emotions in me when I think about it. But I cannot possibly understand it truly, because I did not live it.
If you have read or seen "The Devil's Arithmatic" I think you may be able to see what I'm saying. The main character is a spoiled modern teenager who doesn't quite understand what the big deal is about tattoos and not going to Passover Sedar. She opens the door for Elijah at the Sedar, and is transported to the 1940's, where she lives the experience of her namesake at a concentration camp. Yes, unrealistic, but it makes the point hit home. It's possible to empathize with our ancestors pain and suffering, but we will never truly understand what happened, and therefore let go of the pain- it isn't our pain!
The book also discusses forgiveness from a Catholic point of view. I went to a Catholic pre-school, and attended a Catholic church much of my life with my father's side of the family, however I never attended any religious education (of any kind) and so never went to confession, etc. However, even though I have thought about it, I never considered how heavily all those confessions must weigh on the person hearing them. You can't absolve the person of the sin, from my point of view, but now you walk around with knowledge of so much pain and guilt. It's not your own, but when confronted with the offended party (who may or may not be aware of the offense/perpetrator) how do you handle that?
Also I wonder- do we all base our views of forgiveness on the teachings of our own faiths? And for those that do not identify with a "brand of faith" (not sure of a better way to put that), how do you determine whether to forgive or not? Do they believe in forgiveness?
That's why I knew "The Storyteller" would be a challenge for me to read. I'm a Jewish woman, my faith is very much a part of my life. I spent 10 days in Israel in college, and I have visited numerous Holocaust museums over my lifetime. Since returning from Israel, I haven't read another book on the Holocaust. Not out of any major reason, I'd read many before my trip- "The Devil's Arithmatic", "Anne Frank", "Night", and the hardest to me.... "The Painted Bird". That was the last one I read, and there is a graphic scene that has replayed in my mind whenever the Holocaust is mentioned.
My grandparents were not in the camps- they were living here in the US by then, fighting with the Allies when the time came. However there was family there that was lost. I, like Sage in "The Storyteller" never got around to asking my grandparents for more information. Out of teen indifference, or fear of the truth, I don't know. If I had to pick a regret in my life, it would be not learning more about all four of my grandparents while I had the chance.
Regardless, when Hubs went to the book signing last week for me, as I'm still to sick with Hypermesis Gravidarum (pregnancy acute morning sickness), I knew that reading this book would be an emotional rollercoaster for me. Admittedly, most JP books are. When he handed the book to me, he begged me to take it slow, and put it down for as long as needed. I started reading right away, and usually I finish a book in a day or two. Today, because there's lovely weather occuring, my office shut down and I came home and finished the book. I won't post any spoilers, but I will say while I was not expecting the ending (either plot twist), I am in shock.
The subject of forgiveness is the primary question of the book- who has the right to forgive? Are there sins that are unforgiveable? Can you make amends for decisions and actions by doing good later? When I was at Yad Vashem, our guides and our Rabbi discussed with us the "Jewish stance" on forgiveness. You cannot grant forgiveness for something done to another. It made so much sense to me then. A man in our group was very upset by this- he blames Germans (the Nazi Germans, today's Germans) for the "crimes against our people". This only made it more clear to me. How can I forgive a person I never met? How can I forgive something that I've only been told, and never experienced? I've read many stories, heard others, seen the pictures and the stones from the Warsaw ghetto. I believe the Holocaust happened. It brings up many many emotions in me when I think about it. But I cannot possibly understand it truly, because I did not live it.
If you have read or seen "The Devil's Arithmatic" I think you may be able to see what I'm saying. The main character is a spoiled modern teenager who doesn't quite understand what the big deal is about tattoos and not going to Passover Sedar. She opens the door for Elijah at the Sedar, and is transported to the 1940's, where she lives the experience of her namesake at a concentration camp. Yes, unrealistic, but it makes the point hit home. It's possible to empathize with our ancestors pain and suffering, but we will never truly understand what happened, and therefore let go of the pain- it isn't our pain!
The book also discusses forgiveness from a Catholic point of view. I went to a Catholic pre-school, and attended a Catholic church much of my life with my father's side of the family, however I never attended any religious education (of any kind) and so never went to confession, etc. However, even though I have thought about it, I never considered how heavily all those confessions must weigh on the person hearing them. You can't absolve the person of the sin, from my point of view, but now you walk around with knowledge of so much pain and guilt. It's not your own, but when confronted with the offended party (who may or may not be aware of the offense/perpetrator) how do you handle that?
Also I wonder- do we all base our views of forgiveness on the teachings of our own faiths? And for those that do not identify with a "brand of faith" (not sure of a better way to put that), how do you determine whether to forgive or not? Do they believe in forgiveness?
Thursday, March 7, 2013
Intro: Here I am!
Hi! I'm Riss, and I'm a nearly 30 year old almost Momma. Hubby and I have been together 8 years, married almost one. We're about to embark on the next crazy adventures of our life including our first child (our Little Hugbug) and buying our first home.
Basics about me:
I am the oldest of two, and the dead center of seven children all at once. My family is a blended concoction of backgrounds and faiths, and are the biggest pains in my butt and have my fiercest loyalty all at once. I was born a "cashew" the daughter of a Jewish mother and Catholic father, and since college have identified as Jewish. I love to learn about different faiths and belief systems, the entire concept of how others relate to G-d fascinates me.
I am seriously opinionated and am not afraid to fight for what I believe in.
I have a bunch of hobbies, and I have a hard time deciding which to enjoy whenever I have free time. I love reading (Jodi Picoult is by far my favorite author), crocheting, scrapbooking, hiking, snowboarding, theater, boating, and general crafty activities. I have a Master's Degree in Architecture, and work in a small firm, primarily on affordable housing and restoration projects.
This blog will likely be a collection of life events, social commentary, crafting experiments, and the general ups and downs of life. But what would life be without a little adventure, right?
Basics about me:
I am the oldest of two, and the dead center of seven children all at once. My family is a blended concoction of backgrounds and faiths, and are the biggest pains in my butt and have my fiercest loyalty all at once. I was born a "cashew" the daughter of a Jewish mother and Catholic father, and since college have identified as Jewish. I love to learn about different faiths and belief systems, the entire concept of how others relate to G-d fascinates me.
I am seriously opinionated and am not afraid to fight for what I believe in.
I have a bunch of hobbies, and I have a hard time deciding which to enjoy whenever I have free time. I love reading (Jodi Picoult is by far my favorite author), crocheting, scrapbooking, hiking, snowboarding, theater, boating, and general crafty activities. I have a Master's Degree in Architecture, and work in a small firm, primarily on affordable housing and restoration projects.
This blog will likely be a collection of life events, social commentary, crafting experiments, and the general ups and downs of life. But what would life be without a little adventure, right?
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